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"trouble is our only friend and he's back again" - james blunt, carry you home

okay. i was feeling pretty down and moody six to seven hours ago and i intended to blog it all out then, but then the thunder and lightning and crazy rain came down and i couldn't because the power got cut. so now, i've pretty much forgotten what i wanted to say. :P

anyway, a pretty weird thing happened to me on friday last week. marcia and i followed nicole home after a day out with tim (yes, our good ol' mr. au!) who is taller and still as unpunctual as ever. XD anyway, marcia's eyes were CRAZY BUGGED cause the pharamacist had given her this aspirin thing that she didn't know she was allergic to. she *snicker* looked like an alien. >:3 i had to follow auntie alicia and uncle geoff to uncle teck soon's house, so we left nikki and marcia back there with nikki making mushroom soup and marcia trying to stop her from putting in more cream just for fun. :P

anyway, in the car, auntie alicia started telling me about this funeral she had gone to recently. her colleague's daughter had recently passed away in a car accident. they were near genting or something like that and this bus came careening down the slope and hit them. the daughter wasn't wearing a seatbelt in the back seat, flew out of the car with her brother, who landed on top of her and died when the ambulance finally came. i was seriously freaked out, this girl was just 16. which is my age. SCARY MUCH. everybody!! wear your seatbelts in the backseat!!!

and then we got to lynette's house and i went in to talk to lyn (duh, who else do i talk to in lynette's house) and she started telling me about this girl at her school who had passed away. talk about deja vu. so i asked her if she was my age and she said yeah. this girl was apparently really really nice and lyn's friend happened to be her boyfriend and this year, for his birthday, she decorated their entire class whiteboard and his table along with cupcakes. OHMIGOD! so sweet. the poor guy. so by this time, the two of us were feeling kind of melancholic and we were talking about death and all that. i think that night, i kind of realized how fragile life is. i mean, i sort of knew it before this, but i think now, i value my life more. imagine, this girl, who is my age, probably thinks like me, wants the same things and all that, she'll never get to experience the things that i will in time to come. she'll never know the satisfaction of finishing SPM.
she'll never feel the jitters that come with the first day of college.
she'll never graduate.
she'll never be able to travel to the places she would have wanted to go to.
she'll never meet the man who will keep her heart.

i think that, in this present day and age, we really have to make the most of what we've got right now. i know i will do my best. i really want to do alot of things before i die. i want to take courses like art and design. i want to do photography. i want to travel to latin america and to europe and to the UK. i want to go bungee jumping. i want to stand on top of the eiffel tower and i want to walk through the grand canyon. i want to experience my first kiss before i die. i want to go out and buy myself an LBD (:P). now i realize that i might die before i get to do all this.

i'm going to try and make things work now. plan ahead. be spontaneous at the same time, i love spontaenity. so yeah. wish me luck! haha.
note : this does NOT mean i'm going to go around kissing every guy i meet. XD